Pancakes
by ParagonST12
Summary: Love, war, and breakfast. What sci-fi romance would be complete without the fluffy goodness of pancakes. Tali will soon find that being in a relationship with a human has unexpected culinary benefits, amino acid chirality be damned. If happiness is a warm gun, then love is a steaming pile of flapjacks.


**Pancakes**

Tali was certain that she'd never been more unsure about anything in her life as she stood in Shepard's cabin. She stared at the bottle of thick liquid Shepard was holding in his outstretched hand, offering it to her.

"So… what exactly will this do?" she asked hesitantly.

"I told you, Mordin made it. He says it should switch the chirality of your taste and smell receptors" Shepard answered with a grin.

"I know, but… how?" Tali prodded.

Shepard shrugged. "Tali, it's Mordin. Do you really think I understand a quarter of the explanations he gives me? The man must have at least 5 doctorates" he said. "But he assured me its safe, and I know Mordin would never give us anything he thought might hurt us".

Tali crossed her arms and fidgeted a little. "I don't know Shepard… its… not going to be permanent, is it? And what about my cellular metabolism? There's no way that bottle can just change it all to accept levo proteins" she reasoned.

"Relax, it doesn't change your cells, it just blocks the absorption of any nutrients in your gut. You'll basically just be eating nothing and it'll pass right through your system. It's made purely so that dextro races can experience new foods" Shepard explained, then added "And it's not permanent. Mordin said it should last 2, maybe 3 hours tops".

Tali sighed. She was feeling herself begin to relent to Shepards persuasions. Besides, it would be nice for them to finally be able to share a meal together that they could both eat.

"All right, give it here" she said motioning with her hand. Shepard grinned again as he handed her the bottle. "So I guess I have to take my mask off to drink this huh? And to eat whatever we're going to have for dinner" Tali asked.

Shepard nodded. "Yeah, but we had that decontamination sequence installed at the door, so you shouldn't get very sick, right?".

"Not, but I'll still get something. This had better be worth it" she replied skeptically.

Shepard raised both hands palm-up in an exaggerated shrug. "Hey, c'mon. you trust me, right?" he asked rhetorically.

Tali sighed again, then looked up at him with a smile that Shepard couldn't see but could always hear in her voice. "Of course I do" she replied, then lifted her hand up to undo the seals on her purple visor. After a quick hiss that signified their release, she pulled off her mask and set it on the desk next to Shepard's bed.

Shepard smiled as she removed the glass facepiece. He was used to seeing her face by now, but never got tired of it. "beautiful as ever" he said lovingly.

Tali laughed a bit at his corny romantic remark. "Let's just hope I stay this way and the food doesn't make my face swell up like a pregnant volus" she said only half-joking. Tali took a deep breath, and raised the bottle to her lips to take a large gulp. She swallowed, then stuck out her tongue with her mouth open in disgust, making a gagging noise.

"Oh keelah, I hope whatever we're eating tastes better than that" she said with a grimace.

Shepard chuckled a little as he retrieved the empty bottle from her hands. "Don't worry, I've got just the thing" he said as he turned and began unloading some equipment from a box and onto his desk. "It should take about 5 minutes for that stuff to kick in, so just relax while I start working on the food".

"Wait, you're-" Tali began, surprise in her voice. "You can _cook_?" she asked incredulously.

Shepard laughed as he hefted a portable griddle and placed it on the desk's surface gently. "I've been known to. It's nothing gourmet, but… well, I just thought it would be more fun if I made something for you" he said sheepishly as he rubbed his neck.

Tali relaxed a bit as she saw how much effort Shepard was putting into their 'date night'. She could tell he really wanted to do something special for her. She laughed a little as he turned around and continued poking through the box of supplies. "Thanks Shepard, this is very sweet of you" she said. "So, what exactly are we having?".

Shepard turned towards her once again, this time with a carton of milk in one hand and a measuring cup full of a light, powdery substance in the other. He grinned devilishly.

"Pancakes" he stated with pride.

"Pan… cakes?" Tali mimed inquisitively.

"Uh huh. And let's see… we've also got syrup, butter, eggs, some bacon" he listed, then shrugged slightly before he began mixing the pancake batter. "Not really a traditional dinner menu, but I know I can't mess this up. Plus, I'm not trying to brag, but I used to make the best pancakes in the Alliance navy".

Tali giggled at his intentionally exaggerated pride in cooking. This was a side of Shepard not many people got to see, and she was grateful he was close enough with her to show it. She looked into his eyes lovingly. "Well I don't know what any of that is, but if the _hero of the Citadel_ makes it for me, I'm sure it will be great" She said teasingly.

Shepard chuckled as he began to pour the freshly mixed batter onto the griddle. Tali figured the drugs must have started to work, because a warm, delicious aroma began to fill the cabin.

"Ohh, Shepard…" she almost sighed. "that _does_ smell pretty good".

"Haha, well they say smell is half of flavor, so I guess that's a good sign" he reasoned without turning his attention away from his work. As he flipped the first golden-brown cake onto a plate, he poured more batter onto the hot cooktop, then cracked two eggs off to the side to start frying.

Tali began to salivate at the smells coming from Shepard's work station. Normally all she had to eat was nutrient paste and the occasional filtered and pureed Turian cuisine, so to the young Quarian, all the scents assaulting her nostrils seemed exotic and delicious.

After a few more minutes of cooking, Shepard placed all the food on serving plates and arranged it on a small folding table with two chairs he had placed next to his fish tank. Tali sat down and gazed in awe at the feast set before them.

"Wow…" she murmured. "I have to say Shepard, I'm impressed". She looked at the fork and knife Shepard had put out for her. Tali had never really eaten a meal that wasn't through her helmet filter before, so the prospect of using utensils was somewhat foreign to her.

Shepard smiled at her knowingly. "Well don't judge it until you've tasted it. I can show you how to use those if you want" he said, pointing towards the silverware.

Tali laughed. "I've seen you and the others use them enough, I think I can get the hang of it" she answered, then began to awkwardly grip the utensils in her three-fingered hands. After a few shaky seconds they both spun in the air and landed on the table as she lost her grip. "Bosh'tet!" she cursed.

"You sure you don't want help?" Shepard asked with a smirk.

Tali rolled her eyes at his teasing. "No… I've… got… this- dammit!" she swore as they slipped again. "How are you supposed to angle it towards the food when…?" She began, then saw Shepard showing her that she was holding them upside down. "Ah, right" she said with a small laugh as she flipped the utensils around, finding it much easier then. "Okay, here goes…" She said as she began to plunge her fork into the pancake.

"Wait, wait, wait!" Shepard cried as he pulled the plate away from the trajectory of the silverware.

"Ah- What is it?" Tali exclaimed, half in confusion, half in annoyance. She was really starting to get hungry.

"You _cannot_ eat those without this" he said with a grin as the held up the bottle of maple syrup, wiggling it back and forth a bit for emphasis. He popped the cap off and began to pour the thick amber liquid over their plates in generous portions. "Okay" he stated affirmatively. " _Now_ we can eat".

Following Shepard's lead, Tali carefully sliced off a portion from the stack of fluffy golden disks and put it into her mouth. Shepard watched her in anticipation as she began to eat. She chewed once… twice… then on the third she stopped, and her eyes grew wide. Shepard had no idea how to gauge the reaction, so asked "Tali? Is it-".

His inquiry was halted as the Quarian reached across the table and grabbed his wrist as if she desperately needed to inform him of something extremely important. "Shepard… this… Is _incredible_!" she exclaimed. She quickly released him so that she could continue working on her meal, at first eating small bites of the pancakes, eggs and bacon on their own, then trying combinations of the three in the same forkful.

Shepard relaxed as he watched her enjoy the meal he had created for them and let out a chuckle. "Well, I'm glad you like it" he said.

Tali looked up from hungrily devouring an egg and smiled giddily. "Id mighd juf be becauf I've only efer had food in pafte form, but thif is the beft food I've efer eaten" she said, her mouth still full of egg and causing her to slur her words. She covered her mouth and swallowed the rest, a bit embarrassed by her lack of etiquette. Then she bashfully cast her eyes down and softly said "Thank you Shepard. This is really nice".

Shepard smiled at her. "Well, I'd say only the best for you, but this is actually considered a pretty standard breakfast on Earth" he explained with a laugh.

"Well I think it's great. Who knew the great Commander Shepard was such a chef?" she remarked humorously. "Keelah, if this is standard, I can't imagine what a meal at a high-end restaurant on the Citadel would be like…". Tali got a dreamy look on her face as she pictured all the dishes she'd watch her companions eat over the years.

"Well, next time we're there I'll get us some take out and have Mordin whip up another batch of medicine" Shepard stated.

"Really? That would be… Oh Shepard, you don't have to, I mean those places can be expensive and-" Tali started to ramble, but Shepard waved his hand to brush off the comments.

"Tali, don't worry about it. It's really not that much trouble" he reassured her. "Besides, I love seeing you happy. With everything we've gone through lately, you and I deserve a break every now and again".

Tali smiled at the man she loved and reached over to hold his hand. "I said it once, I'll say it again. I really don't deserve you" she said affectionately.

"Ha, well too bad. Cause you're stuck with me" Shepard responded with a smirk. They both laughed and Tali put the last piece of bacon into her mouth, the pancakes and eggs long ago succumbing to her hunger.

"So, room for seconds?" Shepard asked. "I've got plenty of batter left".

Tali shook her head. "Maybe later. But right now…" she stood up and sauntered over to his side of the table. "I want to find a way to thank the _master chef_ who cooked such a fabulous meal for me" she said saucily, then bent over and drew Shepard into a long kiss. When they broke for air, she leaned forward and whispered into his ear "You know, I took some antibiotics when you were busy cooking. They should be kicking in right about now".

Shepard grinned. "Well, far be it for me to refuse the gratitude of a satisfied dinner guest" he said with a grin.

Needless to say, the food was the least of the couples' concern for the remainder of the evening…

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Okay, so I lied and almost immediately wrote another one (certainly my most humor-oriented story so for). I got this idea for this while making breakfast the other morning and couldn't resist trying to make a short little scene out of it. If you're trying to figure out when this story takes place, my own thinking was sometime during ME3, but it could really fit anywhere after the collector base attack in ME2 (it's not super important). Anyway, hope you all enjoy!


End file.
